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1、,大学英语句子写作 -句子优化,is 首先前者的问题在于be动词是静态的，没有活力的，there be 也是如此。makemake sb. do sth-英语的词化程度较高，存在大量词语，一个单词的存在使得很多词语不再被需要。,用词的生动性,避免be形式表达，尽可能选择表示强有力的行为动词，写出生动，简洁，有力，耐读和连贯的文章。,There is a beautiful park near my house. The name of the park is Tian-Tan Park, which was built several hundred years ago. It is the
2、biggest park in Beijing. The Tian-Tan park is famous not only for its beauty but its quietness as well. Near my house stands Tian-Tan, the biggest park in Beijing, built several hundred years ago and famous now for not only its beauty but also its quietness.,Ecological imbalances is the biggest thre
3、at to the survival of wild animals and plants. Ecological imbalances threaten the survival of wild animals and plants, even human beings. The Internet makes me learn English more conveniently. The Internet facilitates my English study.,His criminal record made him unable to be admitted to the univer
4、sity. His criminal record disqualified him from being admitted to the university.,避免一味用 There is 开头。 There are more and more people who realize the relation between examination and teaching methods. The relation between the examination and teaching methods is increasingly recognized.,避免一味用People, I,
5、 We 开头We will always remember the smile on her face. The smile on her face will be firmly rooted in our minds. We certainly should offer good service. Good service is certainly required.,It must be pointed out that.必须指出 It must be admitted that.必须承认 It is imagined that.人们认为 It can not be denied that
6、.不可否认 It will be seen from this that.由此可知 It should be realized that.必须认识到 It is (always) stressed that.人们(总是)强调 It may be said without fear of exaggeration that.可以毫不夸张地说,It-句型的广泛使用,变换句式优化文章1 长句和短句变换 2 主动句和被动句变换 3 非谓语从句变换 4 比较句变换 5 松散到紧凑变换,短句变长句受汉语思维习惯影响，很多考生往往会直接将脑子里的意思译成英语，而忽略句与句之间的联系，导致写出来的句子无法体现
7、英语作为“形合语言”的特点。因此，在平时写作时，考生要注意前后句子之间是否存在联系，善于发现各个简单句之间的关联，用恰当的连接词将简单句连接起来，组成准确地道的复杂长句，增加文章的气势。,【原文】Lies do harm to those who are being told lies. Lies also do harm to those who tell them. 【优化】Lies not only do harm to those who are being told lies, but also do harm to those who tell them.,【原文】Usually,
8、 a fact is defined as a truth. The truth can be tested by observation or experimentation. 【优化】Usually, a fact is defined as a truth, something that can be tested by observation or experimentation.,【原文】Teenagers are pressured by school work. They are also encouraged by their peers. Under such circums
9、tances, they resort to smoking. But sometimes they feel a little guilty. 【优化】Pressured by school work and encouraged by their peers, teenagers often resort to smoking, though they feel a little guilty sometimes.,【原文】When I turned right on the corner, a motorbike knocked into a small car. The motorbi
10、ke was red. There were two persons on the motorbike. The car was yellow. The motorbike fell down. The two persons on the motorbike were slightly injured. The driver came out of the car at once, and asked about the two persons injuries. As soon as I saw that, I made a telephone call to 110. The traff
11、ic police arrived in a short time. 【优化】 When I turned right on the corner, a red motorbike with two persons knocked into a small yellow car. Immediately, the motorbike fell down, and the two persons on the motorbike were slightly injured. At that time, the car driver came out of the car, and asked a
12、bout the two persons injuries. Seeing this, I dialed the 110. In a short time, the traffic police arrived.,2. 长句变短句长句固然能表达出复杂而缜密的思想，但如果片面追求复杂句子，反而会显得华而不实，成为表达的累赘。写作中句子的长短应根据表达的需要而定。短句不仅指句子长度较短，也指句子内部结构精炼，简洁是写作的一个重要原则，用词累赘则是写作的大忌。,【例1】 【原文】His father, who is a salesman, became a millionaire overnight
13、. 【优化】His father, a salesman, became a millionaire overnight. 【例2】 【原文】Perhaps they basically distrusted our capacity to judge correctly. 【优化】They distrusted our judgment.,将下面的长句和短句进行优化改写， 使其更符合表达要求。【原句】 【优化】,【原句】 1. The captain was a tall, thin man with a big mustache. He was pacing the bridge with
14、 a look of importance. 【优化】The captain, a tall, thin man with a big mustache, was pacing the bridge with a look of importance.,【原句】 2. The grading system at our college should be abolished. The students dont like getting grades. The instructors dont enjoy giving grades. 【优化】The grading system at our
15、 college should be abolished, because neither the students nor the instructors like it.,【原句】3. The problem of the reserve of raw materials is becoming more serious. It shows it is important to begin a plan. We should conserve and divide up the natural resources on a worldwide scale. 【优化】The seriousn
16、ess of the problem on the reserves of raw materials shows that it is important to set up a plan to conserve and divide up fairly natural resources on a worldwide scale.,【原句】 4. Some students dont like having roommates. They think every person has his or her own way. And several people living together causes some unpleasantness. 【优化】Those who dont like having roommates argue that several people living together causes some unpleasantness because every person has his or her own way.,
