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1、【申请范文】哈佛大学文书欣赏 领导能力每一篇成功的 essay，都是一种比较有针对性的自我介绍，聚焦于申请表格提出的两个 问题回答”我是谁” ， ”我能提供些什么” ，成功的陈述从未偏离过这两个主题介绍自身，描 述你作为有竞争力候选者的潜能。这是一篇成功申请到美国哈佛大学的 Essay 论文，作者为 Jason Y. Shah。Essay 话题类型为 leadership 领导能力，下面一起来欣赏范文。 At my age, few people can genuinely claim that they have had a life-changing experience. After a
2、ttending Leadership in the Business World (LBW) at the Wharton School last summer, I became one of those fortunate people to have experienced a life-changing academic program. Four weeks of meeting business executives, working with teammates through the night perfecting our professional business pla
3、n, experiencing the independence and responsibility that will come with college . . . none of this was advertised in the brochure for LBW, but all of this is what made it uniquely meaningful to me. The business leadership program centered on one culminating activity: the prestigious LBW Business Pla
4、n Competition. As we prepared for this, we heard from Wharton faculty members and many corporate heavyweights including Brian roberts, CEO of Comcast Corporation. Meeting educators, executives and entrepreneurs broadened my knowledge of business, created a strategic network of connections and proved
5、 profoundly inspiring; nothing motivates me more than seeing hard work and sharp thinking reach fruition. I vividly remember when a managing director of a venture capital frm singled me out for a networking demonstration. Expecting me merely to pretend to hand him a fake business card, he was dumbfo
6、unded by impressed when he glanced back as he accepted an actual business card from my tutoring business. As my business card now rested in Mr. Kimmels rolodex next to elegant cards from established businesspeople, a lesson was ingrained in my mind about acting uniquely in order to distinguish mysel
7、f in a feld of equally qualifed and eager peers. Despite the inherently competitive nature of LBW, I established enduring friendships with students from far-reaching places, such as Shanghai and Accra. We shared stories over meals in Houston Hall about life at home and engaged in heated discussions
8、about business ethics. regardless of the origin of our passports, we became a family while learning about each others cultures and future business aspirations. The lessons of compassion and hard work from the business plan competition also heightened my experience. Once when a fellow marketing offce
9、r was struggling with determining channels of distribution for our product, I disregarded trying to seem individually superior, and we cooperatively tackled the problem. Putting the team before the individual was a concept that materialized itself during my experience. The bonds between all of the s
10、tudents and advisors spurred my entrepreneurial spirit as I experienced how friendship supports business. I knew this experience had changed me forever when I triumphantly concluded our teams business presentation, confdently promoting our product and connecting with a crowd of peers and venture cap
11、italists. During the evening following the presentations, my fellow teammates and I beamed with boundless relief and pride when the vcs announced our team, EnTECH LLC, as the frst place winners of the competition.Exploring and honing my business and entrepreneurial skills was intimidating initially,
12、 yet with creativity, hard work and an unparalleled group dynamic of cooperation, this experience cemented my passion for business and opened grand doors of opportunity. 文书点评： This essay of Jasons helps us appreciate the “entrepreneurial and philanthropic endeavors” that Jason refers to at the end o
13、f his Common Application personal essay “Hurricane Transformations,” (Chapter 15). This type of cross-referencing or linking can be an excellent strategy for presenting yourself as well rounded without trying to cram too much information into a single essay. After reading “Hurricane Transformations,
14、” college admissions offcers are likely to be curious about what Jasons projects as a community leader are; and this essay is the perfect answer to that question. While the first sentence of this essay, “At my age, few people can genuinely claim that they have had a life-changing experience” may sou
15、nd slightly patronizing and condescending, it does succeed in piquing our curiosity as readers and hints at Jasons maturity and confdence. It is important to think about the tone that the overall essay communicates. Jason conveys a confdent tone in his writing by telling us about the “uniquely meani
16、ngful” experience he had through the LBW program, one he clearly fashioned for himself. This contrasts to the more contemplative tone in “Hurricane Transformations.” Varying the tone between essays is a method to show different sides of your personality. Jason gave a brief description of the highlights of LBWs eventpacked four weeks (“meeting business executives, working with teammates through the night perfecting our professional b
