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1、2024/9/221BUSINESS WRITING商务英语写作商务英语写作Course Outline2024/9/222Text Book商务英语写作商务英语写作(修订版)BUSINESS ENGLISH WRITING胡英坤 车丽娟 主编外语教学与研究出版社 2013.82024/9/223Contents1 An Overview of Business Writing2 Structure and Style of Business Letters3 Sales-related Inquiries and Replies 4 Orders and Confirmation Lette
2、rs 5 Letters about Shipment 商商商商务务务务信函的结构与格式信函的结构与格式信函的结构与格式信函的结构与格式商商商商务写作概述务写作概述务写作概述务写作概述 询询询询盘盘盘盘与与与与回复回复回复回复订单与确认函订单与确认函订单与确认函订单与确认函 装运函装运函装运函装运函 2024/9/2246 Letters About Payment and Settlement of Accounts 7 Routine Claims and Adjustment8 Persuasive Claims and Refusals 9 Sales Letters 10 Invit
3、ation and Thank-you Letters付款与结帐函付款与结帐函付款与结帐函付款与结帐函日常日常日常日常投诉与投诉与投诉与投诉与理理理理赔赔赔赔 邀请函与感谢信邀请函与感谢信邀请函与感谢信邀请函与感谢信 销售函销售函销售函销售函 说服性索赔与拒绝函说服性索赔与拒绝函说服性索赔与拒绝函说服性索赔与拒绝函 2024/9/22511 Letters of Apology and Congratulation12 Notice and Announcement 13 Memos and Minutes 14 Preparing resumes15 Letters of Applicati
4、on道歉信与祝贺信道歉信与祝贺信道歉信与祝贺信道歉信与祝贺信通知与通告通知与通告通知与通告通知与通告备忘录与会议记录备忘录与会议记录备忘录与会议记录备忘录与会议记录准备简历准备简历准备简历准备简历申请信申请信申请信申请信2024/9/22616 Letters of Recommendation17 Proposals18 Organizing and Preparing Reports19 Questionnaires20 Business Agreements意向书意向书意向书意向书商务商务商务商务协议协议协议协议 调查问卷调查问卷调查问卷调查问卷推荐信推荐信推荐信推荐信报告报告报告报告2
5、024/9/227BUSINESS WRITING商务英语写作商务英语写作An Overview of Business WritingUnit 1商商务写作概述务写作概述2024/9/228Why to improve writing skills？nThe ability to write effectively is a valuable business asset.nThree reasons: 1) business is transacted in writing; 2) writing effectively helps increase company sales and p
6、rofit; 3) proficiency in writing gives a personal advantage 2024/9/229Tasks of this chapter. Functions of Business Writing. Criteria for Effective Business Writing. Modern Changes. Basic Patterns of Writing 2024/9/2210nEvery business message is designed to achieve a specific business objective. Its
7、success depends on what it says and to what extent it induces a favorable response from the reader.2024/9/2211I. Functions of Business WritingBusiness writing has three functions: 1.To inform2.To influence3.To entertain2024/9/2212To informnMessages to inform are used to convey the vast amount of inf
8、ormation needed to complete the day-to-day operations of the business.ne.g. explain instructions to employees, announce meetings and procedures, acknowledge orders, accept contracts for services, etc. 2024/9/2213nThe major purpose of most of these messages is to have the receiver understand a body o
9、f information and concentrate on the logical presentation of the content.2024/9/2214To influencenA business message must also influence the readers attitudes and actions. ne.g. letters promoting a product or service and seeking support for ideas and worthy causes presented to supervisors, stockholde
10、rs, customers/clients, and others.2024/9/2215To entertainnTo secure the desired response, it is necessary to have an adequate knowledge of the English language and an understanding of human nature. nThe writer should have an acquaintance with the particular interest and, if possible, the emotions of
11、 the reader. 2024/9/2216nIt seems easy enough, for example, to ask payment of a bill, but it is quite difficult to secure payment without offending the reader and losing his or her future patronage.nNo communication is wholly successful unless it retains the readers goodwill.2024/9/2217Functions of
12、Business Writing(1) To inform convey informationexplain instruction, announce meetings and procedures, acknowledge orders, accept contract(2) To influence affect the readers attitudes and actions(3) To entertain retain the readers goodwill2024/9/2218Criteria for Effective Business WritingnSuccessful
13、 business message: (1) the receiver interprets the message as the sender intended it (2) it achieves the senders purposes.2024/9/2219II. Criteria for Effective Business Writing 6/7CsnCourtesy nCorrectnessnConcisenessnConsiderationnClaritynConcretenessnCompleteness2024/9/2220CourtesyBeing very polite
14、, even in asking the addressee to pay back the debts or refusing his demands, your letter still should be very mild and tactful.Being prompt in replying to the opposite parts letter. The reply should usually be sent on the same day. If it is impossible for you to give a prompt reply in detail on the
15、 same day, you should write a short not to the client explaining why.nGoodwill Effects: friendly, courteous things that make relations between people enjoyable.2024/9/22212024/9/2222Example 1nDear Sirs, we are sorry you have misunderstood us. ()nDears Sirs, we are sorry we didnt make ourselves clear
16、. ()nWe cannot understand why you have had trouble with these articles. ()nWe presume that there must be some reasons for you having trouble with these articles. ()2024/9/2223nI write to send my congratulations.nCongratulations to you on your promotion!nWe wont be able to send you the brochure this
17、month.nWe will send you the brochure next month.2024/9/2224nYour letter is not clear at all. I cant understand it.nIf I understand your letter correctly (tactful)nUsing your-viewpoint -a technique for building goodwill -emphasizes the readers interest and concerns.2024/9/22252024/9/2226 Different At
18、titudes We/I attitude You attitude1.A large sale of our products will make our company more profitable.2.We are in need of fund and you must pay 3.We can not offer you any refund 4.Obviously you forget telling us the color1.A good sale of the products will benefit you.2.To maintain your excellent cr
19、edit, please remit3.You could obtain a refund if 4.Please indicate your choice of color2024/9/2227Examples of You-attitude nWe-view point 1. I am happy to report 2. We are please to have your new account 3. We make Willet razor in three weightslight, medium, and heavy.nYou-view point 1. You will hap
20、py to know 2. Your new charge account is now open for your convenience . 3. So that you can choose the one razor that is just right for your beard, Willet makes razors for you in three weightslight, medium, and heavy.nTaking a positive tone2024/9/22282024/9/2229nProject a Positive, Tactful ToneChapt
21、er 32024/9/2230Project a positive , tactful tone (1) n1. State ideas using positive language Speak of what can be done instead of what cannot be done, of the pleasant instead of the unpleasant Positive words make messages more diplomatic and promote positive human relation Think of examples of negat
22、ive language you have heard that could be easily be stated using positive words. 2024/9/2231nDont forget to submit your report nWe cant ship your goods untilnYou neglect to indicate the specification 1. State ideas using positive language nRemember to submit nYou will receive your goods nPlease send
23、 the complete specification 2024/9/2232Negative attitude Positive attitude1.We cannot deliver your order on schedule because of the earthquake.2.Now that we are short of funds, we have to put the proposed project aside. 1.We will deliver your order when the road resumes to traffic. 2.If we solve the
24、 financial problem, we will start the project.2024/9/22332. Avoid using second person when stating negative ideas nYou made numerous mistakes on this page. nYou keyed a perfect copy. ( preferred) This page contain numerous mistakes. ( preferred) 2024/9/22343. Use passive voice to convey negative ide
25、asnSuburo did not proofread this proposal carefullynSuburo completed the job two months behind the schedule nSuburo completed the job two months ahead of the schedule nThe proposal was not proofread carefully nThe job was completed two months behind the schedule nThe job was completed two months ahe
26、ad of the schedule2024/9/22354. Use the subjunctive moodnNegative I cannot accept the recommendation I am not able to accept your invitation nSubjunctive Mood I wish I could accept the recommendation I could accept your invitation if I were to cancel my meeting on 2024/9/22365. Include a pleasant st
27、atement in the same sentencenYour personal ratings for communication ability were satisfactory.nYour personal ratings for communication ability were satisfactory, but your rate for technical competence was excellent.nBeing conversational 2024/9/2237Conversational languageDull and stiff1.Please be ad
28、vised that your should sign the form before the 1st.2.Kindly advise at an early date.3.I herewith hand you 4.Thanking you in advance Conversational 1.Please sign the form before the 1st.2.Please let me know soon.3.Here is 4.Ill sincerely appreciate2024/9/2239CorrectnessnCorrect grammar, punctuation
29、and spelling are basic requirements for business writing, In addition, correctness means choosing the correct level of language, and using accurate information and data.2024/9/2240Example 2nEnclosed is the copy of receipt. ()nEnclosed is a copy of the receipt. ()nI am looking for another sales chann
30、els. ()nI am looking for other sales channels. ()2024/9/2241nA. with pronouns. Our competitors were most successful than ours. (us)nB. with adjectives. The two first ( first two) items are not available.2024/9/2242nC. with article. We are interested in same. (the same)nD. with verbs. Neither of the
31、offers are (is) acceptable. A block of flats are (is) being built.2024/9/2243nE. with adverbs. We had a quite (quite a) successful meeting.nF. with conjunctions. He not only built (built not only) houses, but also flats.2024/9/2244nG. with participles While studying the report, the telephone rang. (
32、insert “I was” between while and studying) While I was studying the report, the telephone rang.nSpecial attention should also be paid to names of article, specifications, quantity, figures, units, etc.2024/9/2245Avoid Sentence FaultsSee the following examples:nAvoid fragments (不完整的句子不完整的句子). nAvoid
33、comma splices（逗号拼接句）（逗号拼接句）.nAvoid run-on sentences（连写句）（连写句）. nEliminate misplaced elements.nEliminate dangling modifiers(垂悬修饰语垂悬修饰语) . 2024/9/2246Avoid fragmentsnA sentence fragment lacks either a subject (Actor) or verb (Action). nMy research report in business communication took a long time to p
34、repare. And turned out badly.nMy research report in business communication took a long time to prepare, but it turned out badly.2024/9/2247Avoid comma splicesnA comma splice results when two sentences are incorrectly joined or spliced together with a comma. nProfits were down in 2005, the Board blam
35、ed the recession.nProfits were down in 2005. The Board blamed the recession.2024/9/2248Avoid run-on sentencesnA run-on sentence joins two complete thoughts without proper punctuation. nEmployees want to keep their jobs they will work hard for promotions.nEmployees want to keep their jobs. They will
36、work hard for promotions.Eliminate misplaced elementsnWe have taken the check to the bank , which was unsigned. nThe three year budgets are being returned to the strategic planning committee, which have some serious defects.nWe have taken the check which was unsigned to the bank.nThe three year budg
37、ets, which have some serious defects, are being returned to the committee.Eliminate dangling modifiers1.To create that bar chart, the information must be keyed into a spreadsheet (电子数据电子数据表表)file.2.Although tied up, the feasibility report had to be completed.1.To create that bar chart, you must key
38、the information into a spreadsheet file.2.Although she was tied up, Sonia had to complete the feasibility report.2024/9/2251ConcisenessnEffective writing is conciseeach word, sentence, and paragraph counts. Conciseness means to write in the fewest possible words without sacrificing completeness and
39、courtesy. nConciseness will give emphasis to your message.Time is money.2024/9/2252Communicate concisely 1. Eliminate redundancies Redundancy: a phrase in which one word unnecessarily repeat an idea contained in an companying word. e. g. exactly identical, past history, advance forward, brief summar
40、y, honest truth, hot water heater 2024/9/2253Communicate concisely(2) 2. Use active voice to reduce the number of words 3. Include only essential information 4. Eliminate clichs that are often wordy and not necessary to understand the message5. Do not restate ideas that are sufficiently implied 6. U
41、se suffixes or prefixes 7. Use compound adjectives 2024/9/2254Example 3nWe do not anticipate any increase in prices in the near future. (Poor)nWe do not expect prices to rise soon. (Better)nOwing to the fact that your competitors price is much lower than yours, we cannot accept your offer. (Poor)nBe
42、cause your competitors price is much lower than yours, we cannot accept your offer. (Better)2024/9/2255Shorten wordy expressions.nWe have begun to export our machines to countries abroad.nWe have begun to export our machines .2024/9/2256Use words to replace phrases or clauses.nIn the event that you
43、speak to Mr Wood in regard to production, ask him to give consideration to the delivery schedule.nIf you speak to Mr Wood about production, ask him to consider the delivery schedule.2024/9/2257nWe require furniture which is of the new type.nWe require new-type furniture.2024/9/2258Example Cluttering
44、 wordsnAt the present timenFor the purpose ofnFor the reason thatnAn accordance withnIn the near futurenIn view of the fact thatConcise substitutionsnNownFornSince, becausenBynSoonnSince, because2024/9/2259Example Cluttering wordsnOn the basisnOn the occasion ofnWith a view tonWith regard to, with r
45、eference tonPrior toConcise substitutionsnBynOnnTonAboutnbefore2024/9/2260Surplus wordsnThere are five rules that should be observed.nFive rules should be observed.nIn the period between June and August they found the error.nBetween June and August they found the error.2024/9/2261Repetition nIt came
46、 at a time when we were busy.nIt came when we were busy.nJewelry depreciate in value slowly.nJewelry depreciate slowly.nIt will cost a sum of $130.nIt will cost $130.2024/9/2262nHe asked about a certain person by the name of Bill Jones.nHe asked about a person by the name of Bill Jones.nWe met in th
47、e city of Columbus that year.nWe met in Columbus that year.nThe cellphone sells for the price of $79.99.nThe cellphone sells for $79.99.2024/9/2263nOur new model is longer in length than the old one.nOur new model is longer than the old one.nThe consensus of opinion is that the tax is unfair. nThe c
48、onsensus is that the tax is unfair.2024/9/2264ClaritynClarity tells the reader exactly what he or she wants and needs to know, using words and a format that make your writings totally understood with just one reading. nShort, familiar words and simple, short sentences rather than long, difficult wor
49、ds and complex and long sentences are better for this purpose.Time is money.2024/9/2265Example 4nThey have a decided advantage in regard to freight. (Poor)nThey have a decided advantage in regard to freight charges (运费运费). (Better)nThey informed Messrs. Smith and Richardson that they would receive a
50、n answer in a few days. (Poor)nThey informed Messrs. Smith and Richardson that the latter would receive an answer in a few days. (Better)货运；运费；船货 2024/9/2266freight freit n. n1. goods carried by a large vehiclen2. transporting goods commercially at rates cheaper than express ratesn3. the charge for
51、transporting something by common carrier we pay the freight the freight rate is usually cheaper 2024/9/2267nThe ship stopped here to take in freight. 这艘船在这里停泊装货装货。nPlease quote us prices including insurance and freight to Vancouver. 请报包括到温哥华的保险和运费运费的价格。nFrance derives 16% of revenue from air freight
52、. 法国国家税收的16%来自于航空货运货运。2024/9/2268ConcretenessnYour writing should be vivid, specific and definite rather than vague, general and abstract, especially when you are requiring a response, solving problems, making an offer or acceptance, etc.2024/9/2269ExamplenOur apples are excellent.nOur apples are ju
53、icy, crispy and tender. (Concrete)nSmithton Company is our big buyer.nSmithton Company did more than one million USD worth of business with us in 2005. (Concrete)2024/9/2270nThese brakes can stop a car within a short distance.nThese Goodson power brakes can stop a 2-ton car within 24 feet.nA decisio
54、n has been made to set up an office in Osaka.nThe board of directors decoded to set up an office in Osaka.2024/9/2271CompletenessnInclude all the necessary information and data in the message because information and data can help senders get receivers responses and achieve desired objectives. An inc
55、omplete message may result in:nincreased communication costs;nloss of goodwill, sales, and valued customers;ncost of returning goods;nwasted time trying to make sense out of the incomplete message.2024/9/2272Example 6nSuppose you are writing a letter to your supplier telling him that his goods were
56、not delivered on time. What kind of information should you include in your letter? 2024/9/2273Complete messagenReminding him of his promise of timely delivery.nWhat losses has this caused you?nAsking for compensation if there is any agreement on that.nExpecting no such thing will happen again.2024/9
57、/2274III. Modern ChangesnGoodwill Effects: friendly, courteous things that make relations between people enjoyable.n Other Effects: persuasion/ emphasis/ downplay 2024/9/2275Suggestions:1. Conversational style2. Informal style3. Avoid the old language of business4. You-viewpoint (you-attitude)* Avoi
58、d insincerity 2024/9/2276suggestions5. Accent on positive language6. Singling out your reader7. Using the readers names8. Avoid anger2024/9/2277IV. Basic Patterns of WritingnDirectness in Good-news and Routine Messages (deductive approach)nIndirectness in Bad-news messages and persuasion or sales le
59、tters (inductive approach)演绎法演绎法 归纳法归纳法 直接法间接法2024/9/2278Directness in WritingThree parts:1）begin with the major idea, 2）provide supporting details after the main idea3）end with goodwill.2024/9/2279 Dear Mr. Johnson, Will you do George Baryon and me the favor of providing an evaluative report on him
60、? He is an assistant shipping clerk with you, who wants to manage a branch for us. He has authorized this inquiry. How well does he know packing and hauling techniques? How do you judge his administrative ability to run an office of one secretary and a work force of five? What is your appraisal of h
61、is ability to meet customers and generally build goodwill with the community? As a final question, is there anything else you can tell me that might indicate whether Mr. Baryon is the right person for our job? I will be grateful for your answers. Of course, whatever you report will be held in close
62、confidence.INQUIRIES ABOUT PEOPLE Dear Mr. Johnson, Will you do George Baryon and me the favor of providing an evaluative report on him? He is an assistant shipping clerk with you, who wants to manage a branch for us. He has authorized this inquiry. How well does he know packing and hauling techniqu
63、es? 2024/9/2280 How do you judge his administrative ability to run an office of one secretary and a work force of five? What is your appraisal of his ability to meet customers and generally build goodwill with the community? As a final question, is there anything else you can tell me that might indi
64、cate whether Mr. Baryon is the right person for our job?2024/9/2281 I will be grateful for your answers. Of course, whatever you report will be held in close confidence. Sincerely yours, 2024/9/22822024/9/2283Indirectness in WritingGuidelines for Bad-news Messages Four parts:1)A buffer;2)Reasons sup
65、porting the negative decision;3)A clear, diplomatic statement of the negative decision;4)A helpful, friendly, and positive close.2024/9/2284Congratulations on Setting a New Sales Record Last Month! Your All-out Efforts Are Apparent to All of Us. As you know, for the past three years we have held our
66、 product price constant so that we could increase our share of the market. Because of this price lid and because of your effectiveness, we have achieved au even greater market share than forecast. But inflation over the past three years has driven up our product costs. So we are no longer operating
67、as profitably as we must. To keep salaries in line with the inflation and to maintain2024/9/2285the industry-standard profit margin of 3 percent of gross sales, prices of all our products will be raised 10 percent on the first of next month.To generate ideas that will help motivate our customers to
68、accept these price increases, the marketing department and sales department will hold a joint meeting at 10:00 a. m. next Thursday in Room 336. Please plan to attend it. We need to develop some good ways to minimize the impact of these price increases on total sales and to maximize your commissions
69、of next years sales.2024/9/2286A buffer1. As you mentioned, prompt delivery is so important that we have been making every effort to accomplish it.2. We appreciate your writing to us about the quality of our products.2024/9/2287Reasons supporting the negative decision1. As you know, supplying best q
70、uality products and services is our companys policy.2. The treatment you asked is only allowed to those that have an annual turnover of up to $2bn with us.2024/9/2288A clear, diplomatic statement of the negative decision1. For this reason we can only offer the retail price. Compare:(cannot grant the
71、 discount as requested)2. We find it difficult to ship the goods before Christmas.Compare: (can not ship)2024/9/2289A helpful, friendly, and positive close1. Thank you again for your cooperation in this matter. 2. It would be possible for you to obtain a trade discount of 2% if payment is made on a
72、cash basis.2024/9/2290Indirectness in Persuasion and Sales Writing1) Open with words that a) set up the strategy needs and appeals, emotion, logic, and credibility, and b) gain attention.2) Present the strategy (the persuasion), using persuasive language and you-viewpoint.3) Make the request clearly
73、 and without negatives a) either as the end of the letter or b) followed by words that recall the persuasive appeal.Persuasive writingnDear Mr Johnson,nWe sincerely appreciate your interest in an account with our company. Whenever we can, we are always willing to serve you.2024/9/2291nIn determining
74、 what we can do for you regarding your June 5 request for credit, we made the routine checks you authorized. The information we have received permits us to serve you only as a cash customer. But as you know, cash buying here at our discount prices can make a very real saving for your budget.2024/9/2
75、292nWe hope to see you in the store again very soon, and we look forward to the opportunity of serving you.nSincerely,nSimon SmithnCredit Manager2024/9/22932024/9/2294Summary. Functions of Business Writing. Criteria for Effective Business Writing. Modern Changes. Basic Patterns of Writing. Avoid Sentence Faults2024/9/2295 Thank you!
