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1、黄西Joe Wong演讲原文及注释（修正版）2010年4月27日 duo 3 条评论不是翻译，只是部分注释，原文黑色，注释蓝色My name is Joe Wong. But to most people, I am known as “Who?” which is actually my mothers maiden name, and the answer to my credit card security question.开场先是自嘲下自己默默无闻不为所知，然后利用中英文谐音，再联系到信用卡密码保护，因为网上注册时 选择用于取回密码的验证问题里，最常见的就是妈妈的姓氏是什么。Joki
2、ng aside, I want to reassure you that I am invited here tonight.因为前一阵子白宫举行一个活动，美国一对夫妻混过白宫层层保安，装作是白宫邀请的贵宾，还跟这些政客 合影留念并发到网上，其中就有坐在边上的副总统Joe Biden，被曝光后，在美国引起很大争议，白宫的安保问题被质疑。I grew up in China. Who didnt?我在中国长大，谁不是呢？装作无知，认为每个人都是中国人，暗讽了一些美国人的自大，以为世界就是美 国。Most of my childhood memories are ruined by my chi
3、ldhood. When I was in elementary school, as part of the curriculum, I worked at a rice paddy next to a quarry where they use explosives to break rocks. Thats where I learned that light travels faster than sound, which is almost as slow as a flying rock.主要是用生动而夸张的语言形容小时候生活环境的恶劣，光速比声速快，后者跟石头飞散的速度差不多，就
4、 是远处一道闪光，几秒后隆隆爆炸声伴着小石子飞溅过来。另外提到rice paddy，呼应后文自己在rice university读phd。My dad was a grumpy guy. But occasionally he tried to cheer me up with jokes. When I was 7 he said to me, “Son, why is tofu better than centralized socialist economy?” 5 minutes later, I said, “Why?” He said, “Because I said so!”形容
5、父亲脾气暴躁，毫无逻辑，颐指气使。5分钟后是笑点，如此荒谬的问题还想了那么久。这两段就是夸 张描述下自己的童年，因为跟美国人的经历完全不同，观众会因为新鲜荒谬而发笑。In 1994, I came to the United States to study at Rice University in Texas, that wasnt a joke, until now. I was driving this used car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said,
6、 “If you dont speak English, go home!” And I didnt notice it for two years.that wasnt a joke, until now.这句是临场发挥，效果很好，因为前面提到rice paddy，所以强调一下这个不是笑话，是真的。bumper sticker这个牌子的内容和所用的语言本身的矛盾是一个笑点。 We always wanted my son to become the president. We try to make him speak Chinese at home and English outside
7、in public. Sometimes I had to say to him in public, “If you dont speak English, go home!” He said, “Why do I have to learn two languages?” I said, “When you become the president, you will have to sign legislative bills in English, and talk to debt collectors in Chinese!”此处用到了刚才sticker上的话；间接表达了中国是美国的
8、债权国，属于monologue常用技 巧：政治时事热点就那么几条，关键是能够委婉间接的通过不同的段子说到这个点上。After I graduated from Rice, I decided to stay in the US because in China I cant do the thing I do best here, being ethnic. In order to become a citizen, we immigrants had to take American history lessons with questions like: Whos Benjamin Fra
9、nklin? We were like, “Ahh., the reason our convenient store gets robbed?” Whats the second Amendment? We were like, “Ahh., the reason our convenient store gets robbed?” What is Roe vs Wade? We went, “Ahh, two ways of coming to the US?”我在中国有件事肯定不如在美国，那就是民族性。用同一个答案回答了两个美国历史问题，非常有笑果，用 移民的角度“误解”美国的著名堕胎案
10、判例，是一般美国人无法想象的视角。Later I read a lot about American history. So much so that I started to feel white guilt.In America, all men are created equal, but after birth, it depends on their parents income for early education and healthcare.这段看上去很诡异，作为一个黄色人种，怎么会有这种优越感，去产生white guilt，实际上在为后面跟总统比做铺垫。I read on
11、Mens Health magazine that president Obama every week has two cardio days and 4 weight lifting days. I dont have to exercise because I have health insurance. I live in Massachusetts where we had universal healthcare and then elected Scott Brown. Talk about mixed message! I think there was a movie abo
12、ut him. Its called “Kill Bill”这段是一种很微妙的搞笑，如果奥巴马那天不是临时有事，在边上坐着的话会很有意思。kill bill的bill不是指克林顿，应该指法案。Scott Brown是共和党人，刚当选麻省议员，反对全民医保。所以说他kill bill “扼杀了（医保）法案”。We have Mr. vice president Joe Biden here tonight. I have read your autobiography and today I see you. I think the book is much better. They shoul
13、d have cast Brad Pitt, or Angelina Jolie.美国政客是要被随时拿来开涮的，其他的comedian讽刺起来比黄西狠得多。这里提到皮特和朱莉可 以做两种解释:一是自传的文字都可以用来形容明星了，二是若将自传拍成电影的话得请他俩来出演才够格。We have many distinguished journalists here whom I consider as peers. I once wrote for the campus newspaper. Journalism is the last refuge for puns. Only in a news
14、paper can I say, “I was born in the year of the horse, thats why Im a neigh-sayer (nay-sayer)” ,my point exactly.马叫声英文是neigh，neigh-sayer就是发出马叫声的人，谐音nay-sayer，后者 是总说反对意见，投反对票的人，na这个词y常用在现场口头投票，如果反对，一般说nay，不说no。在座很多记者，我认为是我的同行，还有上面的自炫比 奥巴马优越，因为不用健身，都是一种比较难解释很微妙的幽默，可以理解为对那些自我感觉良好的人的一种讽刺。my point exactl
15、y，这正是我想说的，是用这个蹩脚的双关来解释共和党近一年来的表现：对奥巴马的几乎所有提案都持反对票，同时讽刺一下他们的动机：就是为了 反对而反对。This is my first time on CSPAN, a channel I obvious always watch when I couldnt handle the demagoguery and sensationalism of PBS and QVC. If I still couldnt go to sleep after watching CSPAN, there are CSPAN2 and 3!PBS有点类似中国的中央电
16、视台，弘扬主旋律为主，QVC是电视购物频道，所以说这俩的审查和煽动性 比较强。明知自己的演讲时CSPAN在直播，但还讽刺一下这个电视台，美国人很喜欢这么干。CSPAN相当于美国国会的监控录像，全天直播国会的各种会 议，听证，刚开始看了新鲜，时间长了就很无聊。I was just thrilled to be invited to tonights event. I showed the White House my jokes about the president, and thats when Obama decided not to come and started the immigration reform. Take that Stephen Colbert! Obama has been accused of being too soft. But he was conducting two war
