托福作文写作范文详解society

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托福作文写作范文详解 A company is going to give some money either to support the arts or to protect the environment. Which do you think the company should choose? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 1. 题目翻译: 一个公司准备出资支持艺术戒者保护环境?你认为公司该如何选择? 2. 审题关键词: Art; Environment; Money; Contribution to the society 3. 论证分析: 正: While the arts are activities of humankind, the environment is a victim of humankind, and therefore every effort should be made to protect and restore it. 正: The environment is a local and a global issue, and improvements need to be made at every level and in every corner of the world. 正:The protection of environment can highly increase the reputation of the company in the society. 范文: The decision between supporting the arts and protecting the environment is a difficult choice to make, but I would choose protecting the environment. Arts help to maintain our culture and serve as a source of entertainment. However, we need a healthy environment in order to survive, so we must protect it. We need to protect the environment now to help prevent health problems, to maintain the ecosystem, and to preserve the Earth for our children. 此段结构 本段是一个总分的结构。首先第一句话即点明了主旨,让步的告诉我们作者支持保护环境而丌是发展艺术。后面对主旨迚行了简要分析。最后一句话提出 health,ecosystem和 children 这三个分论点,引出下文。 此段功能 本段是文章首段,引出要讨论内容,帮助作者陈述观点,摆明立场,提出分论点,引出下文。 Pollution from factories and cars can cause damage to the environment. Moreover, pollution causes health problems particularly for children and the elderly who have weaker immune systems.We need to ensure that there are controls on the amount of pollution when possible so as to prevent health problems caused by breathing dirty air. 此段结构 本段是一个分总的结构。首先前两句话告诉了我们污染可能给人们带来的危害,最后一句话是本段分论点,即我们要保护环境才能免除我们的健康问题。 此段功能 本段是文章的第二段,也就是正文第一段,写了支持作者立场的第一个分论点。 We also need to pay attention to the ecosystem. Trees, plant life, and people all depend on each other. An unhealthy environment can have harmful effects on the ecosystem. For example, if a plant dies because of changes to the environment and that plant is food for an animal, that animal won't have any food. If humans use that animal as a food source, there could be big problems for not only the natural world but for human society. 此段结构 本段是一个总分的结构。首先第一句话即点明了主旨,我们要保护生态环境。第二、三句话对主旨迚行了简要分析。后面是补充的一个植物死亡的例子,生动具体,帮助论证了这个观点。 此段功能 本段是文章的第三段,也就是正文第二段,写了支持作者立场的第二个分论点。 If we do not respect our environment now, it will continue to get worse and our children will suffer the consequences. They may not have the same quality of air to breathe or natural beauty to admire. Without clean air to breathe, a healthy ecosystem, and a future for our children, the human race will not survive. That is why protecting our environment is important for ourselves and our descendants. If we have a healthy environment, we have healthy children who will be able to participate in and appreciate the arts. 此段结构 本段开始承接了上文,告诉了我们如果不保护环境,我们的子孙就会受到危害。迚而引出了本文主论点的重述,即我们必须保护环境,为了更好的生活。所以,本段可以分为两个层次,第一个层次升华地引出为后代的考量,第二个部分是强调我们需要保护环境。 此段功能 本段是文章的尾段,承接上文,重申论点。 满分因素剖析: 一、 语言表达 本文句式和逻辑都并不复杂,既没有华丽的词语,也没有冗长的句子。然而作者的用词精确严谨,句子简洁有力,很好地完成了题目要求,并阐述了自己观点,不失为一篇佳作。 1. We need to ensure that there are controls on the amount of pollution when possible so as to prevent health problems caused by breathing dirty air.此句中,ensure 后面引导宾语从句,that 后面的内容出现在及物动词后面,做主句的宾语。So as to 不 to, in order to 的意思相同,都表示为了...的意思,引导目的状语。不过 so as to不能有在句中,而 to和 in order to 可以放在句首。 2.That is why protecting our environment is important for ourselves and our descendants .此句句是一个带有表语从句的复合句结构。Why 引导表语从句,接在系动词之后,做句子的表语。That is why.... 这种结构经常出现在托福和 gre 写作中,意思是"。。。的原因是什么"。下次写文章要阐释原因时,除了 because 以外,不妨试试这种写法。 Arts help to maintain our culture and serve as a source of entertainment.maintain 的意思是"保持,维护"的意思,在托福作文中比较常用,还可以用 preserve,keep,protect。Serve as 的意思是"有....作用",是一种高级表达,在托福作文中可以替代 can。 If we have a healthy environment, we have healthy children who will be able to participate in and appreciate the arts.本句作为文章的结尾,写的非常有深意,既重申了保护环境的重要性,又照顾到了文章的另外一个主题"appreciate art"。这样文章就全面的回答了题目所问的问题,这种写法值得我们学习。 二、逻辑结构 本文采用正正正的大正论述结构,简单易懂,结构清晰。文章每一个段落内都是总分(分总)结构,非常中规中矩,而且举了一些生活中的例子,使得论证逻辑严谨,内容丰富。文章的尾段写的非常有深意,首先先是一段升华,告诉我们如果丌开始保护环境,我们现在将殃及我们今后的子孙。最后收束全文,重申论点,告诉我们保护环境的重要性,呼吁大家进行环境保护。
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