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1、如何提高你的影响力 How to Enhance Your Influencing Power,戴尔卡耐基 （Dale Carnegie),一、如何受到他人的欢迎 二、如何赢得他人的信任 三、如何打造有魅力的人格 四、如何具有打动人心的说服力,一、 如何受到他人的欢迎 How to be a popular person?,批评就像家鸽，最后总会飞回家里,Instead of condemning people, lets try to understand them. Lets try to figure out why they do what they do. Thats a lot m
2、ore profitable and intriguing than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness. “To know all is to forgive all.” As Dr. Johnson said:“God himself, sir, does not propose to judge man until the end of his days.” Why should you and I?,不要批评、责怪或抱怨他人。,渴望欣赏,Lets cease thinking of our accompli
3、shments,our wants . Lets try to figure out the other persons good points. Then forget flattery.Give honest ,sincere appreciation.Be “heartly in your approbation and lavish in your praise,“and people will cherish your words and treasure them and repeat them over a lifetime - repeat them years after y
4、ou have forgotten them.,真诚地赞赏他人。,先人后己,Here is one of the best bits of advice ever given about the fine art of human relationships.“if there is any one secret of success”,said Henry Ford,“it lies in the ability to get the other persons point of view and see things from that persons angles as well as
5、from your own.”首先想到他人的需求，引起他人内心迫切渴望的需求,要对方喜欢你，那么你要先喜欢对方,If you want to make friends,lets put ourselves out to do things for other people -things that require time ,energy,unselfishness and thoughtfulness. If we want to make friends,lets greet people with animation and enthusiasm.When somebody calls
6、you on the telephone use the same psychology.Say “Hello” in tones that bespeak how pleased YOU are to have the person call.真挚地关切他人。,用微笑给人留下最佳的第一印象,Actions speak louder than words ,and a smile says ,“I like you.You make me happy.I am glad to see you.” Your smile is a messenger of your good will.Your
7、smile brightens the lives of all who see it.To someone who has seen a dozen people frown,scowl or turn their faces away,your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds.Especially when that someone is under pressure from his bosses,his customers,his teachers or parents or children,a smile can
8、help him realize that all is not hopeless-that there is joy in the world.保持微笑。,记住姓名是很重要的,People are so proud of their names that they strive to perpetuate them at any cost.We should be aware of the magic contained in a name and realize that this single item is wholly and completely owned by the pers
9、on with whom we are dealing and nobody else.The name sets the individual apart ;it makes him or her unique among all others.The information we are imparting or the request we are making takes on a special importance when we approach the situation with the name of the individual. 记住他人的姓名，因为对这个人来说，它是语
10、言中最甜美、最重要的声音。,静静地聆听比夸夸其谈更有用,People who talk only of themselves think only of themselves. So if you aspire to be a good conversationalist,be an attentive listener.To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering .Encourage them to talk about themselves and their
11、 accomplishments. Remember that the people you are talking to are a hundred times more interested in themselves and their wants and problems than they are in you and your problems做一个善于静听的人，鼓励别人多谈论他们自己。,从他人感兴趣的话题开始,Talking in terms of the other persons interests pays off for both parties.Howard Z.Her
12、zig,a leader in the field of employee communications,has always followed this principle.When asked what reward he got from it,Mr.Herzig responded that he not only received a different reward from each person but that in general the reward had been an enlargement of his life each time he spoke to som
13、eone.谈论别人感兴趣的话题。,真诚地让他人感到自己很重要,There is one all-important law of human conduct.If we obey that law,we shall almost never get into trouble.In fact,that law,if obeyed,will bring us countless friends and constant happiness.But the very instant we break the law,we shall get into endless trouble.The law
14、is this :always make the other person feel important. So lets obey the Golden Rule,and give unto others what we would have others give unto us,How?When?Where?The answer is:All the time ,everywhere.让他人感到自己重要而且必须真诚地这样做。,二、 如何赢得他人的信任 How to be a trustworthy person?,争辩是不会带来胜利的,You cant win an argyment.Y
15、ou cant because if you lose it,you lose it;and if you win it,you lose it.Why? Well,suppose you triumph over the other man and shoot his argument full of holes and prove that he is noncompos mentis.Then what?You will feel fine.But what about him?You have made him feel inferior.You have hurt his pride
16、.He will resent your triumph.And -A man conviced against his willIs of the same opinion still.只有一种方法能得到辩论的最大利益那就是避免辩论。,避免树敌,If you can be sure of being right only 55 percent of the time,you can go down to Wall street and make a million dollars a day.If you cant be sure of being right event 55 percen
17、t of the time,why should you tell other people they are wrong? You will never get into trouble by admitting that you may be wrong.That will stop all argument and inspire your opponent to be just as fair and open and broad-minded as you are.It will make him want to admit that he,too,may be wrong.对别人的意见表示尊重，千万别说：“你错了。”,
