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1、1高三英语作文竞赛一等奖作文How to develop tourism career of Zengcheng With the development of the economy and society, in the last few years, great changes have taken place in Zengcheng, which is of great benefit to it, especially the tourism career. Therefore, how to develop Zengchengs tourism career is the key
2、 to its economic development. As a result, we should make full use of its tour resource in Zengcheng as well as its advanced location.Situated in such developed areas as Guangzhou, Dongguan, Shenzhen and Hongkong, Zengcheng has great development space and good prospect depending upon the “intercity
3、radiation effect”. Thus, we should try our best to develop a good traffic to attract a lot of tourists at home and abroad, such as the coach, the ship and even the railway station. As we know, good traffic makes much of a difference to its tourism career.In addition, there are a variety of places of
4、 interest in our hometown, like Wanshou Temple, Baihua Temple, Hexiangu Temple, Baode Temple, old fairy rattan and so on. As a consequence, its essential for us to advertise those places of interest to let people know. For example, we can have them announced through media, like Internet, TV, etc. th
5、at make our life more convenient.Whats more, with nine forest parks and natural ecological protection zones, we can take advantage of them. Take Baishuizhai provincial scenic spot for example; our government can give financial support to build it well, which is sure to be another attraction. Moreove
6、r, as the famous home of Litchi, we could make it a special brand of us by training more experienced farmers.All in all, I believe that our hometown will become stronger and stronger.点评：本篇习作紧扣短文材料，抓住增城旅游业某一方面的特点重点展开论述,中心突出, 思路明确; 概述与点题比较到位；文章条理清楚，行文流畅，细致道来，有条不紊，段落与段落、句子与句子之间过渡比较自然。句子长短夹杂，富于变化，使用的词汇也
7、比较丰富。从行文、短语的运用和句子结构的复杂程度来看，作者有较好的语言功底，在写作过程中注意句子之间的衔接，适当使用复合句、非谓语和 it 句式，这些为文章增色不少，因此这不愧为一篇佳作。但文章中也还是出现了时态、语法上的错误，也难免有中式思维的词句，结尾处作者想照应上文，而笔墨不多、语言力度不够的一句，却给读者留下了一种虎头蛇尾的缺憾，如果围绕经济和旅游业结束全文那将会更好。从文章整体看，作者在力图抓住“写作要求”写作时，想对短文材料中的件件事都想写进去但只是点到为止，写得不够深刻和透彻，而是泛泛而谈，似有回答问题之嫌。 （荔城中学 马玉湖，增中 陈亚丽）修改建议：标题 How to dev
8、elop tourism career of Zengcheng 中使用 career 一词不全适，应删除，即：How to develop the tourism of Zengcheng，文章 especially the tourism career 等多次出现的也应删除。that make our life more convenient 应改为 which will make /which makes。which is sure to be another attraction 应改为 which is certain to be another attractionExperien
9、ce Unique She增城中学 来银香The She Nationality Village, being the only gathering place for minority in Guangzhou, is part of the Zengcheng 2tour resource. There is no denying that this character has made this village a special one which attracts tourists to experience its special scenery and culture.The S
10、he Nationality Village, being surrounded by green mountains and flowing water, possesses special culture and special scenery. For instance, the people celebrate different traditional holidays, one of which is called “Chuwu” with relatives getting together to celebrate the coming of the New Year. Whe
11、n it comes to the beautiful scenery, those who have experience it for themselves would never forget the flesh air, the colourful flowers and the lovely birds flying in front of them.How to make full use of these tour resources has more meaning than we expect. First and foremost, the cultural relic a
12、nd festivals, the nationality language must be shown through museums and various activities. Equally important, the village is encouraged to produce their own products or special souvenirs to enlarge their culture effect. Last but not least, the scenery spots can be set up for visitors to go sightse
13、eing. What must be stressed is that environmental effect should be considered at the process of developing tour industry. In order to manage the challenging work, the government should play an important part and co-operate with local minority people. Then the bright future of the She Nationality vil
14、lage and Zengcheng is coming soon.点评：本篇习作紧扣短文材料中的“写作要求” ，即“从某一方面”的“人文景观的开发”出发，切入“畲族民居 The She Nationality Village”的开发来吸引游客，凭借“畲居”得天独厚的地理景观、文化遗产、传统节日、畲族语等来发展旅游业，强调同少数民族合作、关注环境的重要性。文章的思想性比较强，内容充实，语言表达清楚。文章中使用了较为复杂的句式结构，丰富的词汇能满足文章的需要。作者背记了很多习惯表达法，当然在应用过程中，文中的个别句子略显累赘。在尝试使用复杂句式的同时，应注意兼顾文字的简洁明了。 （荔城中学 马玉
15、湖）修改建议：which attracts tourists to experience its special scenery and culture，此定语从句的先行词是 one，从中学阶段所要掌握的规范表达方式考虑应 that 较宜。being surrounded by green mountains and flowing water 应删除 being。Develop litchi culture to facilitate Zengchengs development增城中学 周敏仪As a major component of Eastern Guangzhou, with a
16、 long history and a colourful culture, Zengcheng is playing a more and more important role in Guangzhous development. Why Zengcheng develops so fast? In my opinion, tour industry makes a real difference. Rich in tour resource, recently, Zengcheng has built with many facilities and protected forest parks as well as natural ecological protection zones. In a word, the city had done a lot to develop tour industry.In order to help our city develop more quickly, I, myself, thin
