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1、The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.Monica: Theres nothing to tell! Hes just some guy I work with!Joey: Cmon, youre going out with the guy! Theres gotta be something wrong with him!Chandler: All right Joey, be nice. So does he ha
2、ve a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?（驼背还是秃头？）Phoebe: Wait, does he eat chalk?(They all stare, bemused.)Phoebe: Just, cause, I dont want her to go through what I went through with Carl- oh!（我不希望她走我和Carl的老路）Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. Its just two people going out to dinner a
3、nd- not having sex.Chandler: Sounds like a date to me.Time LapseChandler: Alright, so Im back in high school, Im standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally naked.All: Oh, yeah. Had that dream.Chandler: Then I look down, and I realize theres a phone. there.Joey: Instead of.?C
4、handler: Thats right.Joey: Never had that dream.Phoebe: No.Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I dont know what to do, everybody starts looking at me. Monica: And they werent looking at you before?!Chandler: Finally, I figure Id better answer it, and it turns out its my mother,
5、which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me!Time Lapse, Ross has entered.Ross: (mortified) Hi.Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.Monica: Are you okay, sweetie?Ross: I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied i
6、t around my neck.（我感觉一个人把手伸进我的喉咙，抓住我的小肠，将他从我嘴里拉出来缠在我的脖子上）Chandler: Cookie?Monica: (explaining to the others) Carol moved her stuff out today. Joey: Ohh.Monica: (to Ross) Let me get you some coffee.Ross: Thanks.Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front of Ross.)Ross: No, no dont!
7、 Stop cleansing my aura! （不要驱赶我的灵气）No, just leave my aura alone, okay?Phoebe: Fine! Be murky!（保持晦气吧！）Ross: Ill be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope shell be very happy.Monica: No you dont.Ross: No I dont, to hell with her, she left me!Joey: And you never knew she was a lesbian.Ross: No! Okay?!
8、 Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didnt know, how should I know?Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian. (They all stare at him.) Did I say that out loud?Ross: I told mom and dad last night, they seemed to take it pretty well.Monica: Oh really, so that hysterical phone call I got from
9、 a woman at sobbing 3:00 A.M., Ill never have grandchildren, Ill never have grandchildren. was what? A wrong number?Ross: Sorry.Joey: Alright Ross, look. Youre feeling a lot of pain right now. Youre angry. Youre hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?(Ross gestures his consent.)Joey: Strip joint
10、!（脱衣舞会） Cmon, youre single! Have some hormones!Ross: I dont want to be single, okay? I just. I just- I just wanna be married again!(Rachel enters in a wet wedding dress and starts to search the room.)Chandler: And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.)Monica: Rachel?!Rachel:
11、 Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you werent there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!Waitress: Can I get you some coffee?Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High sur
12、vivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross? Rachel: Hi, sure!Ross: Hi. (They go to hug but Rosss umbrella opens. He sits back down defeated again. A moment of silence follows as Rachel sits and the others expect her to explain.)Mon
13、ica: So you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?Rachel: Oh God. well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat（酱油壶）. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a
14、 sudden- (to the waitress that brought her coffee)Sweet n Lo?- I realized that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and thats when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Yknow, I mean, I always knew looked familiar, but. Anyway, I j
15、ust had to get out of there, and I started wondering Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?. (to Monica) So anyway I just didnt know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but youre the only person I knew who lived here in the city.Monica: Who wasnt invited to th
16、e wedding.Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldnt be an issue. （我希望那件事没有发生过）Scene: Monicas Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.Monica: Now Im guessing that he bought her the big pipe organ, and shes really not happy about it
